Crash and burn.....Why can't I stick to my program?

I haven't blogged in a few days due to the fact that I slipped right back into my old ways. I don't know what happened and why I can't just stick to my plans. Its not that I don't really want to lose the weight. Sure seems that way though. Its amazing to me how I can want something so bad and yet not have the will power to follow through to get it. Is there a cure for this? I know some people say its no big deal just don't eat the bad foods. Of course everyone who has told me this is skinny. I am sure that as soon as I figure out how to do that with no problem then I will be thin as well. One of my biggest problems is that I want to eat healthier but everyone around me doesn't. Its hard to cook two different dinners at night. I find myself just eating what they are.
So here is too another start. I have to go shopping again to restock on healthy food so tomorrow morning is my kick off date. I have gotten a small journal to start keeping track of everything I eat, drink, my total calories, and daily exercise. I have found that for me if I don't write every little thing down then it is much easier for me to cheat as well as not consume the right amount of calories and water that I am aiming for. I will be doing weekly weigh-ins every Friday morning as well. To give myself a little added support I will be rewarding myself for every ten pounds that I lose. I haven't figured out exactly what each reward will be but it will not be food. I will be more along the lines of a pedicure or that body wrap that I have always wanted to try. I really think that I will be able to go further with the help of rewards.
Tomorrow is a new day and I know I can do this. Mind over matter, right? My goals can only be achieved with my help.